MOTHERHOOD: The Surprising Treatment That Cures Swollen, Itchy Mosquito Bites

Wow, this article truly a surprises for me.  If you have this product sitting on your cupboard, take it out and keep it in your purse as it will be handy anytime, now that it's rainy season when mosquitos are having a feast.

This article was originally posted on Yahoo!

Not too long ago, my boyfriend and I went to the Dominican Republic to visit his family. I was prepared for the humidity, the fast-paced Spanish, and the endless servings of plantains, but I wasn’t ready for the hordes of mosquitoes. “They bite foreigners more than natives,” my boyfriend warned, and he was right. After just one evening (despite sleeping under a netted canopy!), my legs were covered in huge, blotchy marks that were nearly impossible to resist itching.

After seeing all my bites, my boyfriend’s mother passed me a tub of Vicks VapoRub ($5), swearing it would cure them. I was pretty apprehensive. I seem to be particularly sensitive to mosquitoes, because each of my bites turns into a quarter-sized welt that mars my skin for over a week. But I tried out the remedy on a few spots, mostly out of respect to my potential mother-in-law. To my great surprise, not only was the itching quickly soothed, but each bump faded in a few short days! Turns out the product is used for many ailments in DR, including headaches, fevers, toenail fungus, and more. (It reminded me a lot of Windex in My Big Fat Greek Wedding.)

According to NYC dermatologist Dr. Neal Schultz, host of DermTV.com and creator of BeautyRx by Dr. Schultz, there’s some solid science behind this homeopathic remedy. “Three of the ingredients (menthol, camphor, and thymol) are topical analgesics,” he explained. “They create a cooling sensation and stop the itching.”

The VapoRub was also responsible for flatting each bite, thanks to the formula’s nutmeg oil. This essential oil has anti-inflammatory properties, as well as pain-relieving and redness-reducing benefits. (That’s why it makes such a good at-home acne treatment.) Finally, the cedarleaf oil in Vicks acts as a natural mosquito repellent! Sometimes moms really do know best — I’ll never go on another tropical vacation without stashing a jar in my suitcase.

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MOTHERHOOD: When a Woman Left Me a Note About My Son in the Doctors’ Waiting Room

My heart melt when I  read this article.  My boy has special needs too and we are lucky that we live in a country where people are considerate with PWA(People With Disability).  These people makes our burden lighter.  Their little caring gestures makes our lives better and easier, if only they know it.  I am hoping that there are more people that are compassionate rather than judgemental.

Originally posted on Yahoo!

PHOTO: John Howard/ Getty Images

I’ve learned a lot having a child with special needs. I have learned a lot about his many diagnoses — Phelan-McDermid syndrome and autism among them. I have also learned a lot about myself and other people. Sometimes my son’s presence brings out the good in other people and, unfortunately, sometimes the bad.

As he was growing up, we heard it all: “Why does he walk funny?” and “You need to teach him some manners.” But two negative moments in particular stick in my mind.

When he was young, he had to wear glasses since he was diagnosed with myopia along with optic nerve hypoplasia. He also couldn’t sit up until he was 18 months old because his hypotonia or low muscle tone, so he would lie in the baby carriage while we made our way out and about.

Most of our outings in his first few months were to doctors or specialists to get tests, scans and bloodwork – you name it, he endured it! So it was nice for us to get out to the shops one day. I was looking at some books and turned back to the baby carriage to find a lady, pointing and laughing at my son and his glasses and gesturing her husband to come and look. Yes a grown woman did this! As I was only just starting my journey of motherhood — with the extra bonus of having a very special little boy with a disability — I was mortified. I rushed back to the car and came home in tears.

On another trip out, another grown woman walked past us, looked at my son in his glasses and remarked to her companion, “Did you see him? How ridiculous!” Again, she was referring to his glasses.

As we’ve gone along our journey together, I’ve learned to shrug it off. Of course, this is easier to do on some days than others. Maybe some people need to keep this old adage in mind: “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”

On the flip side, we also come across some lovely people in our travels.

We were waiting in the doctors’ waiting room at the end of the school holidays. My son can sometimes get in other people’s space, and I was in no mood to deal with people today. To minimize this, we went to the children’s area. He could also get a good view of the parking lot from there, since he loved watching cars and waving at people as they were coming and going.

He’s nonverbal so he makes his happy noises when he’s excited. We were in the play area by ourselves. There were big windows between us and the other patients, so he didn’t seem to be bothering anyone. We got a few quizzical looks and a few smiles.

When we finally got in to see the doctor, my son was as uncooperative as ever. I don’t blame him after years of being poked and prodded by every sort of medical specialist you can imagine!

Then we came out and to the reception desk to sort out our payment. The receptionist said, “Another patient gave me this to give to you. I’m not sure what it is.” I was a little worried as she handed me a folded note.

The note read:

I wanted to give you a huge hug – you looked like you needed one.

Your son is a lovely young boy and I hope he brings lots of love + sunshine to your life.

Keep smiling –

an ASD Mum xx

“Is it OK?” asked the receptionist. “Yes, it is a lovely note,” I replied. I paid and went out to my car. I sat for a moment and read the note again with tears running down my face. It was the little lift I needed. And yes, he does bring lots of love and sunshine to my life! It was a beautiful gesture from someone who has been there.

Thank you “ASD Mum” for taking a little time out from your day and doing this small gesture to make another mom feel better.

Special needs moms really do have each others backs!

By Jodie Wedmore

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MOTHERHOOD: Bestselling Book Promises Kids Will Fall Asleep at Bedtime

Reading has a calming effect to many, that is why when we read we get sleepy. 
It's good  to practice children reading at least 20 minutes a day. Studies have shown that reading helps children academically.  Reading to them before they sleep is a special time between you and your child.  So grab any book tonight and read to them.

Link: https://www.yahoo.com/parenting/best-selling-book-promises-kids-will-fall-asleep-126940733592.html

A book called The Rabbit Who Wants to Fall Asleep claims to help children have a restful and long sleep. (Photo: Getty Images) 

Good news for parents of children who either refuse to go to bed or have sleeping issues: A book called The Rabbit Who Wants to Fall Asleep promises to change that.

While the book was published in April 2014, it’s recently skyrocketed in popularity, topping the Amazon bestseller list — a first for a self-published book — and even outselling Harper Lee’s Go Set a Watchman and Paula Hawkins’s The Girl on the Train. And its Facebook page has 20,000 likes and rave reviews from parents who bought the book. According to Amazon, Roger’s story is “a quick and guaranteed way to help your child relax in the evening or during a nap.”

The 26-page book, written by Carl-Johan Forssén Ehrlin, a Swedish psychologist and linguist, uses psychological tricks and positive-reinforcement methods to soothe children to sleep. The premise is simple: Roger the Rabbit is so tired but he can’t fall asleep, so he and Mommy Rabbit visit “Uncle Yawn.” On their way, they bump into Sleepy Snail and Heavy-Eyed Owl, both of whom offer advice on how to catch some z’s. After Uncle Yawn sprinkles magical sleeping powder on Roger, he’s able to make it home and fall asleep in his bed.

Kids are encouraged to yawn throughout the story and emphasize key phrases to help them drift off, and parents can insert their child’s name into the story to immerse them.

How legit is the book as a sleep aid? Very, if you take these ominous warnings seriously: “Even if this book is harmless to use, the author and the publisher take no responsibility for the outcome,” and parents are discouraged from reading the book “close to someone driving any type of vehicle.”

The Rabbit Who Wants to Fall Asleep (Photo: CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform)

“It’s the verbal equivalent of rocking your child to sleep,” Ehrlin, of Jonkoping University in Sweden, told the U.K.’s Daily Express. “[It helps] the child focus on relaxation and become part of the story.”

And parents on Amazon agree. While the book only has 14 reader reviews, it’s acquired 4.4 stars. “Both of us were asleep before the book was over. [Definitely] becoming part of our bedtime routine!” one parent wrote after reading the story to her “night owl” son. Wrote another, “Our 9 month old daughter has been wild at bedtime, and we’ve tried so many methods of calming her, but this has been the first thing to get her into sleep mode in under 20 minutes.”

Even a person named Jacob, who gave the book only 1 star, could hardly critique its effectiveness, although he did have a valid concern. “Bought the audio book so I could have my son listen to it in the car,” he wrote. “But I ended up falling asleep at the wheel and crashed my car. This book ended up costing me $3,000 for all the damages to my car, and ended up putting my son’s and my life in danger. I definitely do not recommend this product, and warn people not to listen to it in their car.”

Roger’s exhaustive search for sleep is reminiscent of the 1947 classic Goodnight Moon by Margaret Wise Brown. Unlike the fantastical nature of The Rabbit Who Wants to Fall Asleep, Goodnight Moon used a style of writing called the “here and now” to make bedtime tempting to children. According to a story published by Mental Floss, back then, narratives that focused on children’s daily routines were unexplored territory, which contributed to the book’s success. The modern bedtime story has evolved to books such as the 2011 bestseller Go the F*** to Sleep by Adam Mansbach, dubbed a “children’s book for adults.”

As the mother of a 13-month-old boy who isn’t sleep-trained, I’ve ordered The Rabbit Who Wants to Fall Asleep, and I’m eager to embark on Roger’s adventure — even if I don’t stay awake to finish the story. 

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MOTHERHOOD: Mom’s Striking Photo 3 Days After Giving Birth Sparks Honest Confessions

(Photo: Yahoo!)

This photo has gone viral and reached 15,000 times share. This is a photo of a new mom experiencing post-partum on the 3rd day after giving birth. 

She is Danielle Haines and she gave birth to her lovely son in November 2014. At first, the photo looks disturbing and very unhappy until you read the caption on her Facebook stating "This is a picture of me 3 days postpartum. I was so raw and so open, I was a f***ing mess. I loved my baby, I missed his daddy (he went back to work that day), I was mad at my mom, my heart hurt for my brother because my mom left us and now I had a little boy that looked like him, my nipples were cracked and bleeding, my milk was almost in, my baby was getting really hungry, I was feeling sad that people kill babies, like on purpose, I had not slept since I went into labor, I didn’t know how to put my boobs away, my vagina was sore from sitting on it while nursing constantly, I was kinda [losing] my mind.” 

Being pregnant is hard enough, more so if it's the first time.  You are on a whirlwind romance with hormones. Giving birth, nursing a child and feeling alone are tremendously nightmare. The photo may be distress but if we will look at it on a different perspective, it is moving. This photo shows that post-partum depression is happening and it is real. This represents how vulnerable a mother could get most especially if no one is beside her to go through all that is happening.  Giving birth is a happy occasion but when you are lonely and feel alone, it can be a disaster.  

So for all the moms-to-be and moms in the same situation, fellow mom here behind you and supporting you all the way.  You can do it:)

Her story was originally posted in Yahoo Parenting!

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MOTHERHOOD: How to Deal with a Defiant child: 10 Strategies That Work

I found this article helpful and I feel it might be worthy to share with my readers.  I am raising a boy and we are at the stage that he's strong willed  and really pushing at what he wants.

The author recommends these 10 strategies.
1. Walk away when angry.  Your anger will not help the situation.

2.  Let the child speak up and express his feelings.  Scolding will make the situation worse.

3. Appreciate the child when he is in his best behavior.  I remember my co-teacher told me not to say "good boy/girl", instead say "good job".  Those are two totally different meaning.

4.  Choose what is needed to be compromised and what situations needs a tough "NO".  The rest might not be needed to be discussed at all.

5.  If you are about to compromise, work with your child on how to find solutions.

6. Don't just preach.  Do and show what you tell your child what to exactly do.

7.  Show your child that mommy and daddy makes mistakes too and they know how to apologize, even to small children.  Otherwise, you might be teaching your child to be proud and arrogant.

8.  If you feel your child is with bad company, get him out of the pack.  Surrounding your child with courteous and disciplined children will always be better.

9. Do not only mention the naughty boy that he is.  Tell him too the good things he does.  When you keep on mentioning his negative behavior, it stays in his sub conscious and it can cause his self-esteem to go down.

10.  Never judge his choices.  As parents, we can discuss and explain the consequences of his choices.  From there, we can guide them to think and choose the better one.

As for me, I find that giving him choices makes the meltdown episodes better.  He feels that he has the capacity to make decisions for himself and that makes him think twice.  So far, it works.

These strategies gives me more techniques on challenging situations with him.

I like this quote mentioned in the article.  "The most important work you will ever do will be within the walls of our own homes."

Click here for the complete article.

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ETC. What's Your Nickname?

After a long time working in a school. I came across with too many names and nicknames that I find fascinating. Is it only me?  How can parents be so creative in thinking these nicknames for their children.  Look at the list and let me know what you think.

Muffins
Cartoon
Tiger
Tigress (for a boy)
Coconut
Coco
Soda
Oh-O
3D
Lego
Time
Gun
Tycoon
Film

Do you know other fascinating child's nicknames?  List it down in the comment box.

PRODUCT REVIEW: Trunki

Trunki

It's summer time and it's the best season to travel.  Weather is perfect to go out and explore places.  Our family normally travels at least once a year, either domestic or international flight.  And with my growing LO, he needs his own luggage.  We have been seeing Trunki at the mall many times but for me it's just another fad that makes children throw tantrums, we passed it up all the time.  During the Baby Expo, we found the distributor of Trunki giving it away for 70% discount.  That made me have a second look and eventaully decided to get it for our boy.  I can say it's functional.  I can put all his stuff in it, use it as carry-on luggage, has 4 small and secret pockets (see the yellow arrows), has lock, ID slip, use it as stroller (accdg to the lady it can carry up to 30kg toddler), cute design (there are various designs for boys and girls), he can play with it but most of all, he feels responsible and proud that he has a luggage that he can call his own.  Verdict: Worthy!

UPDATE: We use Trunki on our recent trip.  You can view the video below.  At first, it's quite hard to maneuver it but when you get the hang of it, it will be easy.  We are glad we purchased it. Oh by the way, his luggage is carrying stuff with more than 7kg:)

 

Do you use the same product? Let me know your experience, leave a comment below.  Thanks:)

EBOOK: Your Mini Guide to 50 Common Childhood Ailments

If you are looking for a quick guide to identify your child's ailment right away, this ebook might be the answer.  It provides information about diseases that an average child most likely to encounter in his/her childhood days.  It is intended for mothers who are in hurry to know what's going on with her little one.  Right in your hands, even you don't have internet or wifi

“Your Mini Guide to 50 Common Childhood Ailments” provides general information about diseases commonly experienced by young children. The guide is intended to be a quick reference to assist parents, caretakers and teachers/ school authorities with identifying common childhood diseases so that timely actions can be taken.

You can buy this ebook on www.abookstoreph.com

Love at First Sight

It's love month but I want to highlight the motherly love for our children.  

When I was pregnant with my son, mothers around me said that I will feel the 'love at first sight' once I see him after the delivery.  So as my due date draws nearer, I felt excited and looking forward to that feeling..the feeling I didn't feel for his dad (that's another story).   Anyways, when it's time for the D-Day, I didn't have an easy but a bearable labor.  After a tiring and whirlwind 6 hours labor for me and hubby, I gave birth to our baby boy.  I wasn't able to see him right away due to complication that the doctor needs to do additional procedure on me.  I was put to sleep after he came out to the world and I am in limbo until after a few hours.  When I woke up, hubby wheeled me out of the recovery room and we passed by the NICU.  There he was, my son is peacefully sleeping but all I can remember was, I said "ok, let's go!"  I just want to go to my room and catch more sleep.  

I know I didn't have that feeling but it was more than a love at first sight...it's love that grew more and more each and every day.  There are times I would just want to scream to keep me sane but just thinking of not loving him would mean insanity for us.

This article brought me so much memory that I reminisce my birthing story to becoming a mother...a crazy one but would never exchange it with anything else.

I gave birth to a stranger

How I learned to love my child

By Kate Delos Reyes | Mommy's Instinct – Mon, Feb 3, 2014 3:19 PM PHT

 Photo by Kate Delos Reyes

Read it here... 

You Are My Pea

This a heartfelt clip of motherhood..I miss my baby who made me a mom:)

Our Family's Journey

Not many of our friends knows about my son's congenital defect. We know that there's something wrong with his development but maybe we were in denial to accept the fact, especially me.  It's just too difficult to bear that I am part to blame with his condition.  I've just recently open myself to talk about my son's condition when I heard how my husband casually talk about it with his officemates.  At first, I was hurt and asking how can he do that, this is all about our son.  Eventually, I told myself maybe that's what I have to do, accept the situation and go on with life...go on to find solution for my son. Until this moment, doctors couldn't identify the cause of his defect.  We've been to 4 specialists already and each one of them have different prognosis but most of them mentioned the same thing, that my son has to undergo Achilles Tendon Release.  I've searched about it online and barely could I get an exact condition as him. So, I'm telling his story to help someone who might have the same condition as him.  

My son, now a toddler, cannot walk because he cannot straighten his legs due to the short muscles at the back of his knees. When he was born, his right toes are on top of each other. The doctor said it's "club foot".  Hubby asked the doctor if it's something serious but he said nothing to worry as we can correct his legs by massaging daily.  When we checked photos on the internet none of it are the same as his so we thought, it's really nothing serious.  

When he's about to turn 1 y/o, hubby and I are wondering why he's still not walking. Oh well,we thought he's just a late bloomer and maybe if we buy him a walker he would walk soon. Until he reached 15 months and no walking happening.  We start to bring him to development pediatrician. Lo and behold, she said that there's a possibility that my son has cerebral palsy..the whole world just fell on me! I know how children with CP look like and he doesn't look like anyone of them. She sent us to see an orthopedist.  According to him, my son needs to undergo surgery but he didn't tell us the cause of the defect. Fast forward...we went to another 3 doctors, 1 told us that he'll never walk in his lifetime because he said he has polio, while, the other one doesn't want to do surgery until 7y/o...what!!!...how will he go to school, and he said we can send him to a special school. I told myself, he doesn't need to go to a special school, he is normal therefore he must attend the normal school.

Just to confirm to what they're saying, we consulted to a Filipino orthopedist while we were on vacation in Manila.  According to him, he really need to undergo Achilles Tendon Release Surgery. He also told us that if we delay the surgery he might develop scoliosis.  So after hearing that, when we returned to Thailand we immediately find a doctor who could do it.  Referral after referral, we found at last.

After series of tests, last July, he undergone Achilles Tendon Release...it was heart-breaking to see him struggle.  I thought I would pass out while bringing him to the OR but I have to keep strong for him. After an hour of operation, he's done but he was really frantic with all the anesthesia in his system.  After 2 days,we were on our way home.  After a little over 2 weeks, he can move freely but struggling a little.  Here's the video...Miggy wearing his first leg cast

He was very dependent on us on doing his daily activities. After few weeks the doctor changed his cast and this is how it looks like...Miggy wearing his 2nd cast.  When he changed to 2nd cast, he was able to stand with support already.

After another few weeks, his cast were removed and this is how his legs look like - swollen, dry, beaten, almost black and blue...

He has pressure sore that he complained a lot.  Even a slight pinch, he would cry because of pain...

Then he was advised to wear AFO (Ankle-Foot-Orthosis) for 3 months. Just after a few weeks wearing AFO, he was able to stand and walk with support...all on his own but of course while holding on to something...Walking, Walking...

He was able to wear his shoes a little over 2 months after his surgery...Walking 1, 2...Walking 1,2...

After checking with his PMR doctor, he was advised to change his left brace from AFO to KAFO (Knee-Ankle-Foot-Orthosis) to stabilize and strengthen his left knee.  When we got it the first time, he was hurt, overwhelm and anxious all at the same time...another adjustment but he's really getter better...Walking with KAFO. His KAFO is non-adjustable so he has to drag his left leg just to bring it to front.  Everytime I asked him to walk, it breaks my heart to see him suffer but he just needs to do it.  With his fear, he needs to balance holding any support with both hands.

Just a few weeks after putting his KAFO, I have to find an opportunity that he will let go of his one hand so he can practice to balance his weight...luha, dugo at pawis ang puhunan ko dito (I have to shed tears, blood and sweat) until he was literally forced to let go or else I'll leave him at school...am I a bad mom, I guess yes but this is for him...at nagbungga naman, look at him on this video, he was able to browse other things while he's holding on with another one...another first for us and with me.

On November 30, 2012, I would never forget that historical day(Bonifacio Day), he was able to try to walk on his own, but maybe we are forcing him too much that's why he keeps on falling and cannot keep his balance for a long time...but I know from this day on I just have to wait when he's fully ready.

For his Christmas toy, we looked for a trolley that is stable and will help him gain his confidence but to no avail.  We even bought one expensive branded toy for him but didn't help him at all.  Until one Friday evening, while we are on his reward playtime (in other words more walking practice) at the toy shop, there's this bear workshop that displays a stroller for the bears.  At first, I was skeptical because it's too light for him but the height is so prefect for him...I pointed it out to him and it was him who took it and use it for his walking...he suddenly gained confidence to let go of my hand...he found it helpful that's why even after a numerous of 'dapang plakda'...imagine the kind of dive that splashes water around but instead on water, he fall on flat and hard floor, with chest first...surprisingly, he never cry and just wait someone to pick him up and carry on with walking...This is another first for him, he never experience 'dapa' because we always hold or carry him.  Since then, that stroller is his best friend...Miggy's BFF...hubby said it's time to buy him a helmet, chin guard, sets of knee, and elbow pads not for biking but for his walking...

Weeks and months passed, we are relatively satisfied with his development but then we have to send him to a school.  He's already 4 years old and he missed a lot of things already.  I just hope I can homeschool him but hubby and I need to work for him.  So on Holy Week, while everyone's having their 'Bisita Iglesia', we are doing our 'Bisita Eskwela'...trying to find a school that can accommodate his condition.  I don't think he will be conscious with his disability at this time but I am afraid that if I send him to a big school, he will be bullied...so small and child-centered kindergarten is our best choice...here's the glimpse of his Kindergarten life to be.  Of course, mom is still scared for him but I cannot protect him all the time, mommy also needs to let go of him at some point.

June 10 was his check up with the PMR and orthopedist..they were smiling when they saw him...happy with his development but... the PMR said, my son is depending too much on the brace so she asked us to remove the knee stopper, regularly unlock the brace's joint and eventually remove the brace...honestly, I have no idea how I would convince my son to remove his brace,  now that he can fully enjoy going around even with the help of his stroller.

  

June 12, 2013, Philippine Independence Day, another historical day...I took the opportunity when there's a very few people at the grocery to challenge him to come to me without holding anything.  At first, we created a little commotion since he started to cry and saying "I'm scared"...I wanna say to him "I am scared too" but we just have to try it.  I carried him to a spot where there is no one walking, hold a few inch of his shirt at the back and said "focus and balance lang"...after few seconds, I released my hold and let him go on his own...when he felt that I'm not holding him anymore he tried to stop but then I raised my voice and demanded him to walk (mom's tough love), then he went on walking...and walking...and walking by HIMSELF.  I cannot leave my eyes out of him as I was afraid he would lose his balance and fall...but he never stop until...UNTIL he reached a busy area, someone walk backwards and bump on to him...I carelessly say "P kha" (Ate in Tagalog)...literally napasigaw ako, I think I caught people's attention to look at us...we never intend to cause such scene but who cares, I didn't even look at the woman who keeps on saying sorry (I feel guilty afterwards though)...I looked at him and waited if he will cry...he didn't cry and instead waiting for someone to lift him up...I lifted him, brush his chest and ask if he's hurt...he only said "mom, focus me sa likod"...ano daw? di ko gets...Ah, he asks me to hold his shirt so he could get his balance again then he started to walk again following my command to go to the cashier...from cashier 32, he walked going to cashier 7, that's 25 cashiers apart!!!...without support and without falling...hubby and I were in awe that we forgot to video his milestone, well our milestone...when we reached the cashier I asked if he's still scared but with the smile on his face I know he's not anymore...Thank you Lord for giving him to us, he's our everyday miracle...HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY!...rather HAPPY MIGGY INDEPENDENCE DAY!

Thankful For Our Village

It's been awhile from my last post, and I never realized that it was that long.  When I first started this blog, my only intention were to have an outlet for my feelings as mother, a breather for being a wife and just to express what's in my mind, in other words, a shock absorber.  Not many of my friends knows about it neither a single family member, and that made me feel more relaxed in posting and no pressure at all.  But recently I received a comment for one of my post, asking me to email her.  My only reaction was "whoa, someone's actually reading my blog."

 I feel lucky to be messaged by a reader that with a lot of blog choices everywhere, she chose mine. There are 2 reasons why I was touched by her story, 1st - we are both mothers and 2nd both her and a very close person to me survived an illness that everyone is scared of - Big C. After exchanging few emails, she openly shares her story with me by letting me post her very own life's challenges and triumphs.  And I feel so blessed to be the reader this time.

Thankful for our Village
You have probably heard the saying, "It takes a village", as this is a saying that people throw around when you have a baby. It is also a saying I came to believe. On August 4th 2005 my daughter was born. There were no complications. Once my daughter came, our "village" surrounded us. We had my husband's family, my family and all of our friends coming to meet our little Lily. Things were going great and nothing could have prepared us for what we were about to be faced with.

Within a month of returning to work, things started to change. I was feeling breathless, extremely tired and I didn't have much in the way of energy. Of course, these are all things that are generally attributed to being a new mother, but I just felt like there was something else going on. I visited my doctor and after several tests, we found out what was wrong.  

On November 21st, 2005, I was diagnosed with malignant pleural mesothelioma. This is a cancer that is found in the lining of the lung, which is typically caused by exposure to asbestos. I was unknowingly exposed to asbestos as a child and 30 years later, I ended up with mesothelioma.

My first thought was what was going to happen to my baby. At that appointment, I was not given the best of news. I was told that if I did nothing, I was looking at 15 months left to live. I thought of my baby, my husband, together all alone and without me. I knew at that moment I had to do whatever I needed to in order to save my life. Since I was dealing with a very grim diagnosis of mesothelioma, I went for the most drastic treatment offered. This meant that on February 2nd, my husband and I flew to Boston for my treatment. I had an extrapleural pneumenectomy. My left lung was removed and I spent the following 18 days in hospital. Then there was another 2 months of recovery before I began chemotherapy and radiation. This all happened while learning the ropes of motherhood.

If we did not have our village surrounding us with prayers, love and support, we could not have done it. Our village was made up of all kinds of different people from various parts of our lives. Even those who we did not expect to support us came around when we needed them the most. Then there were some people who we thought would be there but they fled as soon as we tried turning to them. The funny thing about all this is that the cancer helped us to weed out those who are really a part of our village and those who are not.

My parents had Lily live with them while we stayed in Boston. They started as grandparents to Lily and then helped to raise her. Because of this, they had their own village step in to help them out. Many people helped with babysitting and in any other way possible. While we were in Boston, we made some new friends who were going through similar situation. This helped us get through each day.  

While seeking treatment, my little girl was learning to eat solid food, scoot and roll around. I missed these events. I was able to be somewhat included through the pictures of her milestones that were emailed to me. I would show off her pictures, all while trying not to cry. However, Lily was the reason I was there, fighting for my life. I knew she had wonderful caretakers and that she would bond deeply with them.

Now that we have a true understanding of just how fragile life can be, we make sure that we embrace every moment of it. My favorite quote is, "Life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death."

Make sure that you are embracing all that life throws your direction. Cancer is a strange and funny thing. Even though there is a lot of bad that comes with it, there is a lot of good that comes with it as well. Believe it or not, I am thankful for what I have been through as I have learned so much.

Mesothelioma Cancer Alliance - Heather 

Thank you Heather.  Wishing you happiness and the best of health:)

My Little Man is Learning

I've been wanting to send my li'l man to a day care for him to develop his social skills. I'm working in a school and seeing those toddlers coming to school every morning made me want more to send my little man.  I was sent to my first school at 4y/o and elders will always tell my mother that she's sending me so early.  So for a very long time I thought 5 or 6 y/o is the right age for a child to attend a proper school.

Before I have my li'l man, I would see some children less than 2 y/o in a preschool, so I changed my mind and said that I will send my child to school at 3-4.  He's turning 3 soon and I saw his interest in everything.  I think I will change my mind again.  I just felt he'll get bored with school early if I will push him to mainstream learning but I also do not want him to stop from learning.   Since I prepare worksheets for my classes weekly, I thought I'll prepare something for him too to do at home - sort of homeschooling.  I truly appreciates his nanny before who would prepare him some paper to write on or trace some letters.  I don't demand it from any of his nanny but seeing their concern over my son makes my heart melt.

In this age of computers, there's no excuse for me not to let him explore the world outside.  I am just taking advantage with the available technology at home.  With the help of youtube and IPad, I must say his alphabet developed.  He can't say all the letters yet but when I asks him where is letter "A, N, V..." he can recognize and point it.  Then I started to print out worksheets for him to color and asked his 'lolo' to bring out the worksheets before or after his nap.  I also see that he's now interested with clay, so it's time to bring out these stuff that he has long time ago.

I just thought that I can't simply give him any worksheets to do.  He needs consistency to follow through what he's discovering everyday.  So I plan to allow him to explore one letter a week.  That gives us 26 weeks to complete, that's more than half of the school year, whoa!  Of course, I need to be flexible and take it on his own pace.  This is really a good start!  I just hope his 'lolo' would be with me in this journey:)

I am so glad I found these sites for him to watch or for me to get ideas from.

1+1+1=1

TLS Books

Totally Tots

Nick Jr. 

Cool Kids Craft Ideas 

Phonics Song 2 - he loves to watch this 

Now, I feel I want to be a Kindergarten Teacher!

MOTHERHOOD: Are we Stuck?

Oh c'mon, it's 3am...I'm up and ready for anything.  On the other note, I just want to stay in bed while hubby is snoring and little man is pushing himself towards me (to feel comfort maybe).  For the longest time, I'm awake at 3am and can't go back to sleep. So for me to get sleepy again I though it would help to just turn on the laptop and read my (e)mail box, could that really help?  Well, I'd better do something to just listen to my hubby's snore, right?

I found this mail with subject 'Is your Child Stubborn' in my inbox and it got my attention.  It's not that my little man is stubborn but because there are times that he won't listen or simply want things his own way.  This led me to this article How to Get Your Kids To Listen To You.  Now I realized that he may be stuck at times, and so are we.  Yelling won't help at any cost but what if we don't have time to wait for him to move on.  We are using 'Timeout' strategy to let him realize what he has done, it looks like it's working most of the time but of course there are struggling days as well.  This is something new to try, it sounds similar to 'Timeout' anyway.  My only dilemma is that it could be time consuming and at his age would he understand what it means to be stuck. Well, I just have to give him time to take the bits and pieces and I personally need to practice the my 'mom's patience instinct' longer...dad's patience must be overhauled as well.

EDUCATION: Homeschooling

I wanted the idea but homeschooling is not for every parent and of course, not for every child.  It's not one-size-fits-all.  Now let's see if this is for us.

Homeschooling  by Frugal Girls

MOTHERHOOD: Spanking

I came across with this article that I was caught guilty-SPANKING.  When I was still single I told myself that I would never spank my child.  My mom is the disciplinarian in our family though I am more afraid of my dad.  He really has a big and heavy hand so just imagine how hard he could hit us if he is the disciplinarian though  he would hit us once in awhile, thank goodness Im done with that phase.  Now that I have my own family, I try to avoid to hit my son even with the lightest ruler but there are times that my patience just ran away to the door.  I admit that due to his age, sometimes I  really do not know how to explain to him things that I end up spanking him.  Parenting is indeed not easy, I have idealistic way but the reality bites me double time.  This article definitely gives me a wake-up call.

Why Spanking is Wrong  by Circle of Moms

CRAFTS: My Baby's Halloween Costume

I've been looking forward to the halloween celebration this year because I wanted my son to have his 1st official halloween costume experience.  Last year, there was no costume party to attend that's why on his 1st birthday it's a costume party.  He was Santa's Helper on his Santa's workshop birthday party.  It was easy to have his costume made with all the help from my mother.  A few yards of fabric and half day at the tailor then we have our cute little elf costume. 

Isn't he cute?  It's so fun to dress-up babies.  So this year, it was an effort to think for his 1st halloween costume.  When I learned that my family cannot join our school's trick or treat celebration, I was eager to look for a halloween event in the mall.  So when our friend invited us for a "Better late than never halloween party"  I was so excited for my baby.  It was a wish granted for my baby.  I have a lot of ideas in mind but this is what we had for him...

Did you guess what he is this year? My little man is Maggie Simpson!!! He might be mad at us when he sees this when he grows up, but in checking for the costume online, there are a lot of boys too having this costume. It's so simple, cute, effective and most especially it's home-made...even for boys!

It's good that his dad loves to wear blue shirt...with a yellow folder for the hair... then were done! I didn't  put the small ribbon on the hair part anymore to minimize the femininity(is this even a word) of the character. 

He even met Nobita (with wine)...lol!!!

Another cute, simple and home-made costume, right!!!

How to Really Love a Child

I'd like to share this link with you.  This one touched my heart.  Our little man isn't hard to take care at all but there are times my patience run out to the door.  I can relate and totally agree with what's written.  I always think he is the best blessing to us.  He never fails to bring smile to our faces..now I misses him and about to cry...can't wait to get home and embrace him...How to Really Love a child

CELEBRATION: Baptismal Party, 12 April 2009-- Supplier's Rating

This event in our family was way planned since January 2009 but was fully looked into until 2 weeks before the date. After pulling through our wedding via overseas I thought it will be easy for us to do the same thing again, at least not as big as a wedding.

So to continue, here's the rating of our suppliers according to our experience with them. 1-5 highest is 5.

Church: St. Francis of Assissi, Shaw Blvd, Mandaluyong

Peso Power: Php 350.00 + 20.00 per godparent

Rating: 4 stars

We don't have any qualms on getting church for Miggy's baptism. I've thought of church that if we need his documents it will be easier for us to get it. We consider din that it's just near our venue. St.Francis was suggested by my father, so we call them and inquire. It was easy to deal with them. On Holy Wednesday, I went to their parish office to register. It only took me 15 min to do everything. They told me na we must be at the church at 11am otherwise, we will be moved to 1pm. They also said na the door will be closed at exactly 11am, so I must ask all our guests to be at the church or they will have to wait outside. Then, we have no idea ung actual baptismal rite time. We were all at the church before 11 am, together with our guests then mass pa pala ung 11am. Then baptismal seminar for all at 12 noon after that the priest did the rites already. There were I think 20 babies who were baptized during that day, we can't complain coz it's Easter Sunday. We should have chosen a special baptism pero they can do it lang on Saturday and weekdays and our days are so limited. Nevertheless, we enjoyed our first baptismal rite experience. We could have given them 5 pero bec of the false information, medyo hassle kasi everybody's there so early then lahat nagutom na talaga before the reception.

Venue: Function Hall, 8 Wack Wack Condominium

http://venues.multiply.com/photos/album/91/8_Wackwack_Condominium_Function_Hall_and_Pool_Side

Peso Power: 3,000 + 1,500 refundable bond + 1,000 sponsorship fee

Rating: 3 Stars

I was the one who technically found the venue through multiply site. I asked my mom to call the agent who could help us to rent the place. At first we booked the poolside but after paying the whole amount we were informed by our agent that they don't allow any event sa poolside anymore. We were really upset that we looked for another venue. Since it's just 2 weeks away during that time and it will be on Easter Sunday, we were not lucky to find a new place near our preferred church. We dont have choice but to take their function hall. According to the management, its for 80 pax but we only booked 70pax and the set-up of tables didn't fit inside the hall. Also, the place is quite hot because of the big pole right infront of the aircondition so hindi nagcicirculate ung air within the most part of the room. The guests shares with the pool's shower room if nature calls. Medyo naligaw din ako kung saan ung entrance. I didn't like din the way of the security people check our booking. They were asking us the receipt in the middle of the room while entertaining some guests, which I find it very rude. They didn't even call us in one corner to discuss things. Then when we handed the receipt that we got from the agent, he said that's not their receipt in a very loud manner huh, nakakahiya tuloy sa mga bisita. Apart from that incident, we were ok na sana with the venue. The guests liked the venue, the reception is like a hotel lounge. It was on the 5th floor so overlooking the city din. But honestly, the hall is good only for 50 pax with set up na dikit dikit with a little space for program unless siguro na nasa labas ung buffet table.

Caterer: Centertable Catering c/o Millet

Peso Power: Php 370.00/pax + 12% VAT

Rating 3.5 stars

They catered our wedding last year and I can't think of another caterer who could satisfy our taste in terms of food and set-up. It was easier to ask for discount from them too. We should have given them perfect score but we were disappointed when our AE didn't show up to monitor the service and set-up of their people. We booked for 75 people and we invited the same number but less than 50 turned up. We also ordered 10 kiddie meals and only 6 kids were there and some of their parents even get food from the buffet. Then when they packed the leftovers, we were surprised na ang konti lng ng natira, even sa kiddie meal wala kaming naiuwi. My father said he saw one waiter na parang me tinago na black bag sa ilalim nung table while all of us were busy taking pictures. When my brother din asked for additional cheese sticks for appetizer sabi wala na daw, wala pa ung ibang guests nun to think na less than 50 lang ung dumating. Everyone's raving for the food. Masarap talaga ung beef champignon, di ko nagustuhan ung spaghetti meatballs (iba lang talaga hanap ko sa spag), winner ang brownies, masarap ung chicken with corn salsa though di ko natikman ung salsa. Overall, we liked the food, the set-up if only for the service and dun sa packing of leftovers. Dapat meron talaga in-charge from the host to look over sa food. Pati sa drinks parang nabitin kami.

Cupcake Tree: Ronnie Lungsod

http://ronnielungsod.multiply.com/photos

Peso Power: Php 2,000 for 50 pcs cupcake and cake topper + 18/pc.additional cupcake

Rating 3.5 stars

I found Ronnie Lungsod's site through multiply after checking many recommendations from N@W. Ronnie came with the cheapest quote. We don't want to spend so much on cakes so we decided to book him. There was no free taste though they mentioned on the phone na just go to their place for one(na-addict sa free taste). When I went to their place I didn't meet Ronnie, I just ordered through his mother after checking their catalog of cakes. I liked the design of the cake topper though I was expecting na fondant icing or semi-fondant as they told me but its marshmallow icing. For us, nothing special about the taste of the cake neither the cupcake, its normal compared to Goldilocks, mas siksik nga lang (subjective naman ang taste). Another thing I liked, they gave the stand for free so we can use na for Miggy's 1st bday.

Photographer: Jo Lim Photography

http://jolimphotography.blogspot.com/

Peso Power: Php 5,000 for 2 photographers(labor package only)

Rating 5 stars

We love Jo and Gino for taking wonderful pictures of Miggy. I found her through multiply din. It was easy to communicate with her from the first inquiry until the sending of CD. She's very humble, accommodating and down to earth photographer. We didn't encounter any problem on booking, meet-up, on the day of the event. I think she's more on hobbyist and turned into entreprenuer. She's more on food and wedding photography since she's also an event planner. It was hubby who chose her because of the styles we saw on her site. We had photoshoot din after the reception, as our request. Di naman kami nagsisi, she's very helpful din if I have some questions on cameras or editing.

Invites: DIY

Peso Power: Php 0.00

Rating 5 stars-love our own

This is my 1st attempt to layout using Photoshop. Using online tutorial and with a help from my friend(as in online tutorial din) I was able to produce Miggy's invites then sent it to my friends via email. I printed some for the photoshoot pero we forgot naman nung day.

Baptismal Gown: Gift from Nanay Puring, our family friend

Peso Power: Php 0.00

Rating 5 stars

We have the tradition in wearing the same baptismal gown. I remember I wore the same gown as my siblings and cousins. Even before we get married, I have thought that the baptismal gown will have the same material as my wedding gown and will be worn by my children. So we kept the "pinagtabasan" na lace from my gown and made it into a baptismal gown, even the lining was same as what I wore. It was simple but sentimental and Miggy was the only one wearing a gown during the rite. One guest even thought that he's a baby girl, bakit daw mahaba ung dress kung boy, hehehe. Nanay Puring is a special part of us already. Aside from the fact that she is a family friend then assisted me during the hotel preps before , now she did our own family heirloom. Love her!!!

Party Clothes: short sleeves barong and shorts with bow tie set(sando included) bought from Shopwise

Peso Power: Php 270.00

Rating 4 stars

We were on lookout for Miggy's party clothes since February. Then when we went for grocery I saw it in infant's section. I find it cute especially the bow tie attached to the barong, he doesn't feel uneasy naman when he's wearing it but we didn't close the top button na lang. I saw the same set at SM Megamall too. We just bought a separate cloth-like cap that matches the material and color of the shorts so it looks like na 1 set siya. We also used the same cap during the rite, buti na lang we bought it coz I didn't know na kelangan pala ng white veil for girls and hat for boys.

Baby Shoes: Enfant bought from Robinsons

Peso Power: Php 59.00

Rating 4 stars

Isa pa itong ang hirap hanapin na magmamatch sa clothes niya. It was on 50% sale then same material and color for his wardrobe, so swerte talaga. Though very limited and sizes kaya nahuhulog sa kanya, we put on his old booties during the party na.

Souvenir: Lucky Dolls (Bag/Key Chain) from Bangkok (Elephant, Dog, Rabbit, Mouse)

Peso Power: around Php 20.00/pc

Rating 5 stars

Super hit ang souvenir, some even ask for more than one. It was so hard to think of something that relates to Miggy na usable for the guests. It was my sister who thought of giving small elephant dolls. I went to mall in BKK just to look for one then I found a wholesaler from Chinatown. It was good that she has more designs. I chose elephant to represent Thailand where he was born, Rabbit coz it's Easter Sunday, Mouse coz he was born in the year of the rat, Dog coz his daddy wants to get a dog(ang layo ba, hehe). It's been said na lucky daw ung mga dolls for some Chinese belief during the time I bought it kaya super hit sa BKK. We just put a small card saying our thanks.

Guest Card: DIY

Peso Power: Php 0.00

Rating 5 stars-love our own ulit

I just made 5 simple layouts using Publisher with different pictures of Miggy then print it. We gave it to the guests same way as we did during our wedding. There are funny, serious, religious messages for Miggy, something to treasure talaga.

During the reception, we had Baby Bingo for adults and Easter Egg Design for kids. I printed out 30 bingo cards using free program on the net. At first my mother doesn't want it as an activity coz it's not for babies naman, bring me na lang daw corny noh. Shempre si mudra hindi familiar sa mga kaartehan at creativity these days. Ayun, nangunguna sa pagcheck kung meron ng puro during the activity. The guests enjoyed our small activity and actually asking for more, nakakabitin daw kasi ung 3 sets. Simultaneously, the kids were having easter egg design. We brought all the eggs and bought colored pens, after the Bingo we asked the kids to explain what they drew on the eggs, suprisingly ang mga bata ngayon ay environmental conscious, hehehe.

Overall, okay naman ang outcome. What I forgot is preparing the video so when the guests are waiting at the party they have something to watch while munching on the appetizer. That's a lesson learned and will take note for Miggy's birthday. Now, it's time to prepare for his upcoming birthday. It's fun sana to plan and prepare minus the gastos lang sana, hehehe.

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